Finishing the Kim Thing

Yes, it is true - that certain "groovy" woman was a big part of my life, and I am no longer very fond of her.  It is not that she is a bad woman or things bad need to be spoken of her.  She is a woman who is trying - she should be left alone to do such.  She may think whatever she wishes about me (that is her right and perogative), but I also reserve the right to express my feelings about our relationship and how it had its effect upon me.

First, for all you men or women, she is a great lay - I mean that.  Go for it if you can, because it is nice.  It is not an opportunity you should pass up in this life if you have nothing to lose over it.  She will treat you nice, be very kind to you, do things you never thought another would do, and generally help you to be happy and at least momentarily - fulfilled - she is a blessing of the goddess.  Go for her if you have her - "trust me" you ALL have a chance.  She'll never know what the hell she wants because she refuses to ponder it - she really does.  She is AFRAID of somethings so much and few can help her fears of reality.

Go for it.  Love her and try to make her happy.  She needs you!  She needs you all because she is that scared!

But enough of her.  She was great and I will always love her, but we are done.  I mean done.  I might screw her (and of course hang out with her) to comfort her, but it would take a miracle to love her again.  Frankly I think it would take a miracle for anyone to love her because she is so scared of so many things she could never commit to love in that way.  If "real" love is even what she ever wants...

After so many years, it became more about what I knew she needed than me - that chick needs someone to relieve her FEAR.  If anyone can, please do so.

I cannot help her.  Can you believe that?  I know I cannot.  I hope you are tough and intelligent - have fun.  But don't step on her or I will throttle you.  Do not hurt Emily either or I will be forced to do the same - I respect her and her daugher.  Can I help giving a damn?

Anyway...  Have fun you!  Go with it and get involved.  Treat her nice, because I am done.  It takes time getting over a "crutch" you built, but I figured it out - you should be different.  Bless you all.  This is part of my freedom and part of what makes me the great guy I am and will become.

Beautiful, thank you for making me great and also for hurting me as deeply as you did - you did a great thing.  Goodbye.  I choose to be FREE and you are the bottom of the totem pole on that, but thanks for giving me the courage.  You said, "go ahead and just do it", and they were the greatest words you ever gave me.  I wish you could only know how much those words made me who I am destined to be, and how much they changed my life.  Goddess bless you - you have no clue.

I have so much potential, and you saw it - I just needed to hear it and maybe FACE it.  You aren't evil, you are merely a decent woman "trying" - Goddess bless you from now on.

In the Name of Freya,

Alraune

Friday November 28. 1975 - A Primer

November 28, 1975

If you were born on Friday November 28, 1975 as someone very near and dear and extremely close to myself is, then I thought you might be interested in some of the information I acquired doing a little research on this magnificent date of birth. After all, if there is anything to all the hocus pocus of like-being-like, then individuals born on this day must share quite a few similarities on many different levels, right? Individuals born on November 28^th are a club of their own, but if you were born on Friday November 28, 1975, then you are part of a very select group of individuals.

What does this have to do with this blog, you ask? Well, I guess it is an entertaining post revolving around the idea of “knowing yourself” in relation to the magic of the universe, which ultimately has a lot to do with personal freedom and happiness.

First and foremost, you were likely conceived (unless born prematurely or extremely late) sometime within the one month time frame of February 7, 1975 and March 7, 1975 with the latter date, give or take a week, being the most probable date of conception. If such lucky individuals were conceived on March 7, 1975, it means not only that they were conceived on the 66^th day of the year, but they were also born on the 66^th day of Autumn of that year (the Equinox was on September 23). Isn't that cool?

Such individuals were born on the 332^nd day of the year, with 33 days remaining in the year 1975 – there's a lot of double digits involved in the birth of individuals born on November 28, 1975, specifically 11, 33, and 66. Alas, even 1975 when added equals 22 in numerology.

You were born on a Friday, which is sacred to the goddesses Freya and Venus, and the god Freyr (and their equivalent gods and goddesses). It was a Waning Moon (give or take a day or two), and the planetary ruler of your day of birth was Venus – the goddess of Love. Ultimately you were born in a season of waning, during a moon of waning, and on a waning day of the week.

You were likely conceived with the Sun in Pisces. You were also born with the Sun in the constellation of Sagittarius, which makes you what? Awesome! Your modern birthstone is topaz and your ancient mystical birthstone would be pearl. Also, you might have a preference for the color blue, as it is your birth color.

You were born in the Chinese year of the Rabbit or Hare, which if you know anything about totems may say a lot about your personality, and your element, in the Chinese system is wood, with fire being your western elemental ruler.

Your planetary ruler is Jupiter, which is the ruler of the gods. You were also born ten days after a total lunar eclipse which occurred on November 18^th!

Nothing particularly amazing happened on your day of birth, that I was able to find, but all the historical information mentioned does indicate that East Timor declared independence from Portugal on your date of birth, if that means anything.

Some notable people born on your exact day of birth in 1975 were: Eka Kurniawan, an Indonesian author, Park Sung-Bae, a Korean football player, Takashi Shimoda, a Japanese football player, Sunny Mabrey, an American actress, Maurissa Tancharoen, an American actress, Anna Crilly, an English actress and comedian, Penelope Corrin, a Canadian actress, Sigurd Wongraven, a Norwegian musician (in the band Satyricon), Muhammed Suiçmez, a German musician (in the band Necrophagist), and Jenny Klinge, a Norwegian politician. In fact, looking at history it appears that one born on this day may very well be talented at sports, acting, and politics to one degree or another. Other interesting people born on this date (but not the same year) include the Byzantine Emperor Manuel I of Komnenos, the king of Spain Alfonso XII, John Bunyon, William Blake, Friedrich Engels, Jon Stewart, and Anna Nichole Smith.

In the United States, the top songs were “Fly Robin, Fly” by Silver Convention and “That's the Way (I like It)” by KC and the Sunshine Band. The top movies were “One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest” and “Dog Day Afternoon”.

In any event, there you have it – some information for those born on November 28, 1975! BTW, if you happen to have been born on this exact date please drop me a line and say "hi!", and by all means, let's experiment and see if there is anything to be said for astrological dates and times and personalities!

Peace,

Alraune

Fire and Water (a poem)

The Fire that Burns the Water

by Alraune

They always said we were never meant to be,

that your floods would wash all over me.

They said you would wash all I care for away,

that all I ever loved could no longer stay.

They knew of what they spoke,

but far they were from the essence of your yoke.

They had some idea of what they said,

but they had never been inside your head.

You drowned me, yes you did!

You took all of me away and made it hid.

You hurt me bad, girl.

You destroyed my being.

You devastated everything.

But I set fire to your watery waste.

I boiled you to flames in all haste.

I evaporated you from my being.

In my soul you are no longer seen.

My flames burned you away,

you are vapor and that is where you will stay.

Your waters are powerless against my flame,

you are gone, your vapor is all that can remain.

I am a fire with which you cannot compete,

I am the lightning which flows down,

from places even you cannot creep.

I am the fire of being..yeah, I am everything!

Yeah, I am everything!

I set fire to your watery waste.

I'll burn forever.

Feel me, but never taste.

I set fire to your watery ways,

Even the oceans cannot stay.

I consume you with all my being,

Only hope can be seen.

Yes, only hope can be seen!

Like a flash of ligthning,

I scorch across the sky.

I set fire to the rain!

Watch it burn and die.

POOF! You are gone.

You and I are gone!

Some fires can never be quenched...

So mote it be!

Goodbye.

Getting Up Again After a Bad Blow

I can't state enough the condition that I had been in for so long. Much of my life has now been and will always be about getting up again after being severely, violently and brutally pummeled in spirit and mind. The most saddening part is that I do not believe anyone intended to do such to me – I mostly did it to myself.

What I've been through is merely life. I have always been a loving-fighter: a man driven by love for others as much as self. I've always sprung up after being knocked down, but there was at least one time I was knocked down and I never did recover.

The situation is complex and I believe it underlies all other things which I contemplate, complain about, or analyze – it is love. Although many who know me and have heard my words or read them might think it was Kim, it is Tara – the mother of my daughter. Kim was merely an inevitable result of my reaction, rather than action, to how I handled the end of the relationship I had and had wanted between me and the mother of my only child.

I have searched far and wide for answers and I have found some. I have analyzed and blamed myself, blamed others, blamed the system, and generally tried to find the problem and fix it, but it cannot be done. Certainly, I have found many other problems that bug me and have contributed, but in reality the problem is pain, not physical pain, but emotional pain that can never heal – only fade. It is not my pain – it is our pain. How could I possibly fix pain which is not merely my own?

Finding myself saves me, some; successfully fighting to keep my daughter in my life and be a good father saves us, some; getting along with Tara saves us, some; recognizing the hypocrisy and flaws of society saves us, some; and realizing the truth and that I have to get up again some day saves me and my daughter, much, but it is far from over and fixed (if it can ever be such). I don't think anyone can ever know what I mean...

I never got up again.

I found Kim and embraced her because I needed someone, anyone, and she fit the bill. She may have done the same with me for all I know, but that is what I did and why I got hurt even more. I don't think even she realized how badly I had been hurt. How could she? I'm not even sure I did, at the time.

Then I ran to Trish and from her to a few flings, and from them to Diana, and then back to Kim. Such confusion, such ignorance, and only more grief for more people! The poison had set in and I was dying and all I did was poison others, for which all I can grant is my apologies.

It has now been nearly seven years with no significant other, not even a fling and I finally see 'something'. I finally understand 'something'. Is that wrong? Is that too much pain? Is that too much confusion? Is that too much time alone? Is it not enough time to contemplate, face, and heal?

I am lonely. It took me seven years to finally admit it to myself, but I am. I don't know if I can abstain from trying to love any longer. It has been such a 'Long Trip Alone' (as one Dierks Bentley said). I know it is not that I cannot find another (that is impossible in this world and I have already proven to myself I am quite capable of it), but that I refused to do so out of fear for myself, my daughter and the hearts of others. I cannot fix the past, but maybe I can secure something somewhere in the future. Can't I?

I am just so sick of fighting to be free and loved. Maybe I needed this time to discern for myself what exactly that entails and even that that is what I always desired for myself and anyone that I love? It is extremely complex, but I am certain i understand it now better than I ever did, and certainly better than anyone I ever knew had thought they figured.

I have ideas and plans – that is what this blog is about. They may amount to nothing and I may fall again and again, but being who I am I must get up and try. I cannot go on living without at least trying. I look at the wall I constructed showing pictures of my ancestors, offspring, and loved ones and I know that I am here because they kept going and trying again and again.

I feel like I was knocked backwards and beaten to a bloody pulp, kicked, verbally insulted and attacked, spit upon, and whipped with zero regard for my very human feelings or those I care for. I feel emotionally and spiritually raped... I feel as though I was cold-heartedly run through the heart, with a smile on the face of my attacker, abused as a corpse, and then revived by my attacker to relive the moment forever. These feelings are due to many circumstances and individuals (my self and my perspective and underlying philosophical and cultural beliefs included) and no specific individual. I am a large man, trained in martial arts and educated as a bodyguard, so it is very hard for me to even begin to explain what it is like to be beaten so badly – I never experienced such physically. I really have no personal experience to compare this pain, humiliation and suffering too.

As is quite evident from this blog and those who know me, I have no problem laying my heart and mind out for all to see. I quite simply have no way to communicate the pain. I do not want your pity or empathy – I can take care of myself. I just need to say it! I need to lay it out and get it out somehow and some way. I have tried so many times in so many ways for far too long. I have had my butt kicked by life and it hurt badly, but I need to get the hell up NOW! Again, it is hard to even compare in my mind how I should get up, since I have never actually been knocked down. Actually, if you ever think it would be nice to never have been physically beaten up (even by multiple attackers), imagine how you would handle mental and emotional beatings without the comparison – I have none. I have no personal experience by which to compare what I need to convey. Does that mean I should seek it out? Now, that is truly insane and I will not – I need no other such pain. Besides, my reactions are different when I understand everything about the situation – I am far from skilled in relationships although I continue to learn. I really don't know how to get my point across.

I am an angrily loving man, not violent, but intensely, passionately, and almost overpoweringly loving drive. Not the type of love that gets in your face, but that kind of love that gets in a deep relationship. 'Angry' is the wrong word for those who do not know me, but it is probably closest because I am angry for love itself – like Jesus overturning the stands of the money-changers in the Temple. I am pissed off at the lack of love in others and my self. I am pissed off at the lack of understanding and commitment. I am pissed off at pain and violence and destruction – I want peace and love and happiness. I am a man who gives so much space out of love that I get crapped on. I am a man trying to finely balance love for the individual and love for the relationship – that kind of man.

I could never explain that, it must be experienced, but that is me. My words could be taken a thousand ways, but those who know me know precisely what those words mean. I am the closest thing to a true Pacifist there is without being a coward. I am a loving-fighter. Do what you will with your perception and perspective – I know who I am and what I stand for. Enough trying to explain myself. This blog post is not about how I love or I am perceived by a stranger too, but about getting up after a love has gone wrong.

I need to get-up. I need to truly get-up. I have had my time to myself and it has reached the limit of what I can take in self-contemplation. It is time to consolidate what I learned, examine it, plan, and apply it by trying again.

I now know myself much much better. I understand others better. I understand human nature and society better. I have had the benefit of truly raising my own daughter and loving her 50% of the time (after a fight to get that, which it turns out I was right in thinking I needed). I understand my spirituality better and know much more about the core principles behind my thoughts and those of society and other people. I know enough now that I can try again. I may fail, but I have something more to go on and something new to try, which I believe in.

I am able to actually move past specific past relationships and confront the actual past problems associated with them. In other words, I don't need Kim or Tara or Trish or Diana to resolve the past – I just need to understand the relationship, what happened and why. I can actually move forward consciously without hurting another (myself and my daughter included) due to baggage from past relationships and 'try' to love. I actually know what is from then and is not and have an idea how to handle it.

I can face society as a true cynic, knowing that I am an individualist and that “progress” is a term almost no one who espouses has truly thought about; that “conservatism” is phony, and I fit no socio-political mold. I can go forward knowing I believe in something along the lines of “creatio ex deo” for many varied logical reasons, I am a panpsychism, and consciousness goes all the way down, meaning that interrelationships are the heart of every single matter and thus the crux of all experiences of personal heaven and hell.

I was not murdered, I was badly struck. I was burned by the fire of love and life. The burns were extremely bad, extremely painful, and may have even scarred me, but as my life has shown even scars eventually fade and disappear. I cannot take the pain and scars from others, but they will fade and eventually leave myself, so I must trust they will do so for all others.

I need to 'get-up and try'. I need to quite creating excuses to stay down in an attempt to deceive the stronger part of me which demands that I always bounce right up and destroy what has attacked me. I have nothing to destroy, but 'nothingness', and it is time to get up and do so. I now know my assailant and I can finally get up and fight.

This video is amazing as it analyzes true love and the brutalty of it upon the soul (in a metaphoric way, of course), but what is awesome about it is how the man and the woman both throw the chairs (symbolic of sitting still or remaining stationary) at one another and then rush towards one another. It is ultimately about 'getting up and trying' love again. It is truly about trying again despite the pain and suffering – it means it is worth it.

The most difficult thing to fight is your own shadow... Get up with me, my brother or sister – let's TRY!

Peace, love and infinite happiness.

Alraune.

Finally Over That Woman & a Confession of Polyamory

 

It took me nearly fourteen years, lots of tears, and several other women hurt upon the way, but I am over that certain and somewhat "groovy" hippie chick. I am most certain I am not the only one happy to read this!

I loved this woman, or at least I really and truly wanted too. What I now realize is that I loved nothing about her (or almost nothing), but only the things we did together, which means I never truly loved her!

She was and is nearly the exact opposite of me and that fact made for great times and adventures, but was never meant for a lasting relationship, besides...she never was anything I'd call a trophy, especially having experienced other women beyond her who were much more magnificent “to me”. I do not say that to degrade her, but to make the point that she was not meant for me (we each have our own tastes, and I am sure she has her own as well).

I do not hate that woman (this I want to make clear) though at times in our long past I did, and it was because I was not over her despite our having broke up nearly a decade ago now. I realize now that I got over “her” a long time ago, but our time together and memories is what I did not wish to release to the past. She was fun! She was interesting! She pushed me to be me! She was awesome, but she and I are no more, and the woman I knew, or thought I knew is long gone.

She was and is an awesome woman, but she was never for me and she had her purpose for me, and I with her. Goddess did it hurt for so long, but I finally get it – and not like all those times before. This time I really have no feeling when I say goodbye. Perhaps because it has finally been too long, or maybe because I finally get things?

I used to talk to her on social networks, but I cut that off nearly two months ago and I haven't looked back, nor do I intend too. She tried to attack the real me, and that is unacceptable and also very revealing of where we truly stand – we are truly done.

I cannot begin to express to anyone what sort of freedom this is for me. Perhaps part of that freedom is other realizations, but the one which I speak of is very great. I was a slave to her love for quite some time. I even entertained the idea that she had cast a spell on me (having dated two witches after her with whom both relationships failed because of her existence in my life), or that I had cast it on myself.

I really do not know how to express what went on in my head and heart, but I do know two relationships which could have led somewhere and potentially been happy were destroyed because I was not over her. Rest assured, I have no illusions or anything – those relationships are destroyed and will not happen unless some sort of miracle happens (on both ends), so this is no poor plea for their restoration. I am alone and single and pushing 40. Life sucks, but at least I am free from the slavery of love I once felt.

I guess I didn't just have to give up, I had to decide I did not want it!

I now know the liberation she felt in rejecting me. It is somewhat nice to know you never needed someone you honestly thought you needed – to know that whether they were born or died tomorrow it really made no difference in your world other than a few moments.

Don't get me wrong, I am not that shallow and I realize whatever she had to offer to me is part of me forever, but I obviously do not need her anymore, and it is quite probable that I never did and someone else could have done every single thing she ever did for me. She is obviously, as I now realize, not a necessity, nor even any longer a desire. My knowledge tells me she was for me then, but never meant to be forever and certainly never meant to be for longer than she was.

Another thing that kept me “stuck” was children. She helped to raise my daughter and I helped to raise her's, which is something I will never forget, and I could never not love Emily Jo as if she were my own daughter, but still...even that time is past.

I love Emily and always will; in fact, I will always love those whom I had a close contact with, but that does not mean times cannot come and go and also that I cannot feel different about my relationships. Would Emily even recognize me if she saw me? Would I recognize her? What about her and my daughter recognizing one another? If none of us have known one another for a decade or more how can we even know there is anything beyond what there was a decade ago, or, if there is, that it remains as it did then?

The past truly is the past. How do I know I would like what that woman or her daughter became, or that they would like what my daughter or I became? How could any recent love exist, and if it did, how could any believe it would be of the same type or in the same way?

I'd be crazy to think what was is still there, and I no longer even consider that possibility. I have truly and finally snapped out of the irrational and insane concept of unconditional love. It is truly liberating!

I no longer think about contacting her or wondering if she sent me an email – I don't care. In fact I hope she does not ever send me an email again! Why? Because then I know it is done on her end as well. If she speaks to me then I think there is something there, and there is not. It has been so long since I have known her that I cannot even truly call her a friend. What do I know of her but that of years ago?

I'm free! I realize this now, and I hope somehow someone else who is struggling long term to get over another man or woman reads this and comprehends. Did you truly love them, or was it what you did together? There is a huge difference!

I loved hanging out with that woman, going on adventures with her, dreaming dreams, partying, having fun, and seeking pleasure, but that was nearly everything I loved about her. I realize this now after all this time and damage.

I do not blame her but my upbringing and the false concept of absolute love. Yes! I loved her and always will in her time and place, but there always were and always will be many others whom I love in their time and place as well.

So here's to you! I toast you and say “I am glad to say goodbye”. Please do not ever contact me again for anything (even sex – like that time you broke into my home) unless it is truly important. You are good in bed, but you aren't that damn good that I should destroy my potential relationships or life goals for you. And frankly, your sex is the main thing that made me still want you, and when I think about it, Diana was much more fulfilling – though you and I both destroyed that.

Freedom is mostly in your head, but it is also in your heart. Love yourself enough that you can say goodbye to those you think you love and you just might find freedom – that is my advice!

I refuse to burn any bridges and say any further how I feel or what I think, for I may not feel the same or think differently in the very distant future when I am more mature and nearer the end of my life.

I loved you, woman, and I will always love you in our time and in our place, but I was wrong to love you like that all these years and all this time. I betrayed myself and I betrayed others, as a consequence, in loving you like that. Love does not just belong to another (an observer), it also belongs to a time (a space and moment). Do you understand what I am bleeding to you (for I never said our personalities were not real, but rather our subjective observations of them were incorrect)? Do you understand that I believe we are all a part of the Goddess (the All) and that you and I can only therefore see a part of the truth from a small piece of a perspective (in this manifestation and time)?

I can now say with fervor that I am polyamorous, at least in accordance with space and time, for I have loved your equal in another time although I do not see you that way now, nor never envision it again. Do you understand what I am saying? I do not care if you ever felt the same (it does not matter, for love is not necessarily two-way), I felt and feel as such. I love all my loves in accordance with what I shared with them in the most profound way I can on this physical plane. I also love Mom, Dad, Jesse, Mike, Tara, Digger, Danny (and all my close pets), my relatives and ancestors, Quinton, Kim, Trish, Diana, my other good friends such as Steve, Adam, Butch, Steph, Julie, Jimmy, Jimmy and Jimmy, Zach, Robert, Logan, Josh and Josh, Chris, Chris, Kristy, Angie, Jen and almost all I can name from memory in face and name, then those I've worked with, those I only remember a name or face, and those (at all levels of consciousness) whom I have interacted with whom I share some minor bond with (and in whatever order is precise for the moment and time) – I love them in a more spiritual way.

Is this many loves? Yes it is! Am I evil for such? Hell no! Polyamory is REAL and it is right, in my opinion. So there you have it...I can move on from all my past loves and find happiness because I accept the fact that I have many many loves in many many ways in many many spaces and times.

Does no one see the logic in that? The logic in loving many or all you interact with to varying degrees? The logic in embracing it naturally and carrying the same principle to all natural levels?

In any event, polyamory is a human truth, in my opinion, and this is liberation for me – this realization on many levels. I am a lover, so it is hard for me to understand space and time, making my position on love very difficult to discover.

I'm over you, Beautiful. My Love awaits me.

Peace.

Alraune

Update: I removed that certain "groovy" hippie chick's name so as not to offend her. I'm just blowing off steam and sighting personal subjective reasoning – I mean no harm, hate, or rudeness to others. Apparently, "she" is not done with us because she contacted me via email with many complaints. I will try, as a former lover and a good man and friend to work with her and address "her" and "our" concerns. She just needs to understand that I did truly love her and I always will love her. And I am trying to sort that out in my own way.

Jacques Ellul, Technique, Efficiency & Materialism: The Disease of Modern Civilization

Book Review for The Technological Society by Jacques Ellul

I acquired a copy of Jacques Ellul's The Technological Society, translated by John Wilkinson (ISBN: 978-0-394-70390-9), a few months ago. Recently, I finished reading this monumental 473 page critique of technological civilization in its entirety (everything but the bibliography and index). It took me awhile to read it for two reasons: it is rather dull and I was reading it in my spare time (literally sitting in the car before work). The book was extremely interesting but rather dry in presentation. Jacques Ellul is no doubt an intriguing intellectual, but he is fairly lacking in the emotional expression of his personality and it really makes this book a flat read.

That said, I am rather impressed at the scope and depth of his argument against the course of civilization under the direction of blind materialistic efficiency. I am most certainly of the opinion, at this time, that this text is of enormous importance and can be a useful aid in many sociological, anthropological, politically philosophical and idealogical circles.

This book speaks to me because it puts into words some of the things I had noticed and was thinking, but couldn't quite pin down. One of the overarching points which Ellul seems to be getting at is that modern civilization, which has a pervasively materialist worldview, idolizes and gives priority to the value of efficiency, and that materialist based efficiency is cold, calculated, inhuman, and absolutely dangerous and destructive to both human happiness, the value of life, and the ecosystem.

Another major point is that of how man utilizes technique as a tool to ensure his survival, comfort, and evolution through the manipulation of his environment (physical, societal, and psychological) with various techniques. However, in doing so he must adapt to the tool and therefore becomes himself manipulated (physically, socially, and psychologically) by the conditions necessary for the most efficient use of that tool, which ultimately leads to a utilitarian development of personhood directed by massification and materialistic efficiency – man becomes a sort of robotic machine.

In layman's terms and in lay psyche that translates to Jacques Ellul brilliantly defines the coming new world order by examining technique and society. He tells you how the world works, why the world works the way it does, what the various parts of the world system are, some of the methods used within the world system, the historical development of the world system, where this new world system is headed, and even who controls this world system and how much power they have.

Ellul tells us that what are enslaved to the world system: "The 'all' is involved because technique yields results and demands efforts to such a degree that no individual can remain outside. But if technique demands the participation of everybody, this means that the individual is reduced to a few essential functions which make him a mass man. He remains 'free', but he can no longer escape being a part of the mass. Technical expansion requires the widest possible domain. In the near future not even the whole earth may be sufficient." (Jacques Ellul. The Technological Society, pg. 207). He tells us how we arrived in this situation and in the same breath hints at how might free ourselves: "But when the natural is intergrated, it ceases to be natural. It becomes part of the technical ensemble. It is an element of the mechanism, an element which must play its role, and no more." (Jacques Ellul. The Technological Society, pg. 217). Finally, he tells us who controls and shapes the world order: "...there is a limited elite that understands the secrets of their own techniques, but not necessarily of all techniques. These men are close to the seat of modern governmental power. The state is no longer founded on the 'average citizen', but on the ability and knowledge of this elite. The average man is altogether unable to penetrate technical secrets or governmental organization and consequently can exert no influence at all on the state." (Jacques Ellul. The Technological Society, pg. 274). He then concludes: "Technique shapes an aristocratic society, which in turn implies aristocratic government. Democracy in such a society can only be a mere appearance. Even now, we see in propaganda the premises of such a state of affairs. When it comes to state propaganda, there is no longer any question of democracy." (Jacques Ellul. The Technological Society, pg. 275)

I found the last statement striking as it was exactly what I had been thinking when I realized that the world order was designed by aristocrats, yet the common person thinks they can somehow have freedom within a system designed specifically by and for aristocracy merely by altering one or two key components (ie. the political or economic system). What ignorance! Such naivety amounts to believing that by replacing the umpire, switching ball fields, changing teams, or introducing a new ball or bat, it will somehow result in something other than a baseball game. It seems to me that if one honestly believes they can be free within a society based upon technique and materialistic efficiency they are either ignorant to reality or blatantly delusional. How can anyone expect to obtain a very human concept (freedom) from mechanized materialistic efficiency (the world system)? How can anyone conclude that a system designed to control will ever provide individual liberty? These are just a few thoughts this book brings to mind.

Now, this is where I may differ from others who happen to agree with Ellul's assessment, as I do. I do not believe technique or technology are themselves harmful to humanity, however I firmly believe that when humanity is excluded from the equation and all technique becomes founded upon materialism and efficiency it is utterly destructive to humankind and will eventually result in the total loss of all which can be described as human. I believe this is the danger which the technological society, as described by Jacques Ellul, presents to us all, and the very cause of this present darkness. The materialistic world view coupled with technological efficiency is a disease of modern civilization and a scourge upon the universe.



All in all, The Technological Society by Jacques Ellul is an excellent book which I feel should be required reading for any conscious person despite its dry presentation. The wealth of useful information which an individual can extract from this book makes it well worth the time and effort of reading this nearly 500 page text.

Planned Intentional Migratory Communities – What The World Needs

Sometimes what I think I am looking for is a planned intentional migratory community; that is, a group of people who believe in self-sufficiency, minimalism, individual liberty, and some form of primitivism. A small group of individuals who migrate about a certain region living a primitivist or somewhat primitivist life-style.

Personally, I would just like to travel, experience various things, meet new and interesting people, and live on and with the land in as much harmony with it as possible. Yes! I intend to have fun along the way, after all, what is life's experience if it is all serious business?

I'd like to master learning animal tracks and sign, and become an expert in plant and mushroom identification, foraging, preparation, use (both edible and medicinal), and storage. I'd like to learn to pan for gold and find gemstones. I'd like to make crafts (I like to work with wood) and sell them at festivals. I'd like to write, create artwork, and investigate unusual places and things. I'd like to explore the metaphysical as well as the physical!

I want to do all of that as freely as possible, and I guess a sort of planned intentional migratory family or tribe is the very best way I can conceive of it taking place.

This migratory community would ideally live in harmony with the cycles of the environment and seek self-sufficiency, but live in a close enough relationship with technological society to exert a positive influence upon it. It would have a neopagan worldview and a primitivist-type ethnicity combined with a nomadic economy and the all-encompassing encouragement of individualistic creativity and expression. It would be a ragged-tagged band of individualists in an open-relational family who share a common ideological bond in “back to nature”-ism.

This family would not judge one another for being different, but only judge one another based on what effects one's actions have on another. They would be open-minded and not need to have their viewpoint confirmed or accepted, and they would be all about succeeding in self-sufficiency and helping others to do the same. They would be interested in giving or at least giving back what they take, and for this reason they would want to stay somewhat attached to the technological society in order to give everyone in their world a gift and the experience of an individualist in harmony with a collective environment. This family would provide the world with art, holistic medicine, written and verbal knowledge, and the preservation of nonindustrial cultural skills and knowledge.

Such a community would consist of individuals who quit or who are learning to quit the failed system which is the materialistic society, and they would seek to serve as tutors and examples for those masses of people who don't quite know how to quit the system or recognize the broken system from whence their disharmony and dissatisfaction arises.

In order for such a community to survive it would only have to have a few basic principles:

Free love – means one practices hospitality and really shows care for all living things, and love is given freely and expressed freely to all who are capable of and willing to receive such affection.

Individual choice – this entails the encouragement of individual expression, interests, and actions.

Self-sufficiency – this means the encouragement of a non-standardized education and the acquiring of necessary primitive life skills.

Harmonious interaction – which requires the constant striving to live in balance with all of existence while seeking to have the maximum amount of experiences/interactions in the least intrusive manner possible.

I believe such communities can work and would work if the four basic principles presented were within the core ideologies of each individual in each group. Once more, I think those ideologies come natural to all human beings and should therefore not fail unless corrupted by the foundational sins of a materialistic society (eg. greed, murder, hatred, domination, and neglect).

What would get such communities started? Simple. The adequate promotion of international, national, regional, and local open-invitation primitivism gatherings. The very best way to get something of the sort going is by creating a network from which it might blossom. I believe this was the actual intention underscoring the creation of such social events as Rainbow Gatherings and Wild Roots Feral Futures.

Alas! I do long for such a thing. Perhaps I should attend one of the two aforementioned temporary intentional communities wearing a t-shirt stating, “Wild Nomadic Individual Seeking Wild Nomadic Family”? You know, that might not be a bad idea!

Peace.

Alraune