Thursday, October 24, 2013

Grand Ideas

Wow! I have been getting way off track. Not that such was a bad thing, but I need to get back on track lest I faulter and fail. Freedom ain't free, ya know? Or so they say!

I've been kicking around ideas of getting my CDL, mostly because Jen and my good friend Steve both suggested it, but also because it makes sense. I can travel and get paid to do so. It is a way to live within the system and get my way, Certainly I must give concessions this way, but it is a way.

I know it is not what I want to do forever – I want to be free, travel AND make money and exist and thrive on my own or with my team in which I am an equal, not for some company and stock holders. Nor do I want to be constricted by government rules and regulations because I am part of and supporting a system I know and fully believe is broken, corrupt, screwed up to no end and destroying humanity itself.

It's a way, among many to get there, and it may work best for me. I'll have to continue to kick around the idea and see what doors open – that's when I know it is meant to be.

I didn't get anything I truly enjoyed because I went looking and chasing. I got such because a door opened and I walked through.

I see life as this: You see a receptacle and you grab a plug that interests you, you try it. If it works you go, if not you move on. A door opens, you make a choice, and that is that. Free will AND a master plan (someone working behind the scenes).

So what is on my mind? Get a good laptop. Try my hand at microstock photography, continue my efforts at blogging and writing and graphic design and get more serious again. Also try my hand at erotica. AND find a new job to supplement things, including trying a risk-free but sensible and the best option at trucking. I figure it is worth a try. Then learn herbalism and learn it good and go from there.

That's my plan. Plus, get myself a van next year, as I had intended.

I can do all of this while planning and plotting with Jennelle, but I need to stay focused on these things, for they are me.

Also, pursue my mystical and magical and paranormal interests – they are me. Incorporate them into my overall focus and aim somehow.

I have to go there, I have to go now. Life is short and I must stay on task.

I need to find some time to meditate and do spiritual things. I need to get back to my time with the God/dess and think and plot and plan and DO. All I need to do it like before, just set aside and hold to one day a week (a lunar phase), for such things. It makes all the difference.

One cannot sit idly by and wait for the world to become what they wish – they must act, somehow and someway and look for open doors. And you can't act properly or see properly if your head is not screwed on correctly, which is a totally spiritual issue, in my opinion.

You have to remember what means what to you. You have to remember where you came from and where you intend to go. Do you not?

You must be strong and recognize yourself.

Let me say a little of myself. I don't know why, but this comes to mind...

Many say, “the female body is beautiful and best to look at” and I quite agree, but the male body has its own beauty. Study it once. Study it carefully. It is a machine – a powerful machine made to work and war and persevere. It is a beautiful machine, but not a mere mechanical machine, an organic machine of sublime, natural and raw beauty.

Look at the shoulders and the way they are built for power. Look at the hips and buttocks and how they are positioned for explosive power and strength – see how the center of gravity is set perfectly in the male body for how it is made. See the arms, their length and their muscle. See the hands and their power to grasp. Notice the chest muscles and how they are made to push away or lift the body upwards. Study the calf muscles and how they are thick and durable and the shape of the thighs designed to propel the legs and the entire body in any direction.

Study the back. Notice the position of the spine and the muscles which push and pull upon it. Again look at the shoulders and the hips and see how they are built for explosive power.

Then look at the feet and see how well they are made to balance the body they hold up and notice the head which sits atop it all. Look at the skull and how it is made thick and aerodynamic for battle. Notice the nose and the ears and the eyes and how they all sit perfectly, not for beauty, but for the purpose of power, cunning, and battle. How they “fit” for sensory perception in compatibility to the body.

See the intensity of the eyes. Look at the roughness of the skin and its softness which knew no battle. Was this because it fought little or because it fought much and left unscathed?

Study the male body for the beauty it was meant to be studied in. Not for childbirth or attraction to gain it, but for power, protection, and cunning.

I look at my own body and it metaphorically describes me, as I believe all physical bodies metaphorically are the manifestations of the true inner self (good and bad). My body is powerful, extremely powerful, and it comes with an equally powerful mind. I am built to work and war and succeed. When anyone sees me they see my physical power, first. They see how I strive and try and fight and I move forward like a bulldozer and press on and do not cease. Without knowing me they may not see any imagination or thought behind my mechanical being, but they do see the mechanical aspect.

Well, that is my mind and spirit! I move steadily forward and plow over my obstacles without fear or worry that I cannot – I simply do. I may not be invincible, but I know enough to know that I am damn near the fact if I am determined enough. I simply have the mechanics: body, mind, and spirit. I am not to be underestimated – ever. I am a force to be reckoned with, not because I say so, but because I am what I am and I am blessed to be. Look out if I am truly determined and want to do it! Better yet, just get out of the way.

Indeed, the beauty of a man is his machine-like qualities combined with his human emotion. I have these in a very potentiating format. Perhaps that is truly what many recognize in me? I can do it, if I truly want too.

I am not trying to talk myself up – I don't need too. I am trying to make a poetic point. That point is that I can and I will – I just don't know how or when just yet. But I know I will – I know it is already written in me and everyone can see it on the surface. So how much more can they see it if they look beneath?

I guess what I am trying to say is all for me and also for those who need to hear it for themselves. Stay on task, stay on focus. FIGHT! THINK! DO! GET THERE! Count on no one and nothing but you, after all it is your dream and your life. You can share it with others, but it is not truly sharing if it is not your's to begin with. That is why it is important to stay on task and stay focused! You have nothing to share if you have nothing to give, and you have nothing to give if you have nothing of your own.

I think I learned this lesson the hard way when I tried to give all of myself to another and just about destroyed myself doing so. I lost all sense of who I was, which is probably the main thing that went wrong – I will not go there again. I cannot afford too. Where I went was too far. I had the right idea, but all of the wrong conclusions.

There is nothing to share if there is no YOU. That is why it is so important to know who YOU are. Freedom starts with YOU! And relationships are like butterflies and the old saying, “If you love something let it go. If it comes back to you it is your's, if it does not it never was.” What that means is freedom all around. It means true love is sharing and sharing requires freedom and something that is YOU and only YOU to share with the other.

Relationships die two ways: when we lose ourselves and when we lose the “us” and it becomes all about the self. Simple, straight forward, and quite probably fact.

Just let it be.

Strive to be YOU and share what you have to offer with others. Plain and simple.

Can the key to life be that simple?